(Bumpy) Sleigh Ride

Sleigh Ride
As Sung By Ella Fitzgerald

Just hear those sleigh bells jingling, ring ting tingling too,
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you.
Outside the snow is falling and friends are calling "Yoo hoo,"
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you.

Giddy yap, giddy yap, giddy yap, let's go,
Let's look at the show.
We're riding in a wonderland of snow.

Giddy yap, giddy yap, giddy yap,it's grand,
Just holding your hand.
We're gliding along with a song of a wintry fairy land.

Our cheeks are nice and rosy and comfy cozy are we,
We're snuggled up together like two birds of a feather would be.

Let's take that road before us and sing a chorus or two,
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you.

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Wow. It's been quite a ride since I last wrote. Since then, I lost my job at the school, missed Christmas at home, had a fight with my dad and almost stopped talking to my parents, and had an "episode" (read: nervous breakdown) on Christmas day.

Things were going pretty well. I made it home (barely) for Thanksgiving, and got to see a few people, but not as many as I would have liked. I didn't get to stay for very long, and then had to head back for Florida. I wasn't really adjusting to my new job and to Florida really well, but I was being a trooper and trying my best. The only thing that was getting me through was looking forward to Christmas break and coming home to see everyone.

On the Wednesday before break, I was called to the principal's office, and she told me that she was not satisfied with my classroom management skills, and told me that Friday would be my last day. I was completely shocked, since I had received an official evaluation just a few days before that said I was doing a good job. I have a feeling that there is more at play than is outwardly obvious, but I guess I will never know.

So, needless to say, I was really in need of a trip to Michigan, but everything conspired to keep me here for the holiday. Since I didn't have a job to come back to, I had to watch my money, because I need to have cash to live on. Also, I didn't want to risk having problems with the car again on the road (that I couldn't afford to fix), and I had a big fight with my dad, and he asked me not to come home for vacation. Needless to say, I was pretty stressed out, and really wanted to come home. I decided to do the responsible thing and stay here for Christmas, but it didn't really pay off for me. I tried to stay really busy and to not think about it, but I finally had a breakdown on Christmas Eve. I was helping with Christmas dinner, and I couldn't come sit down with the family to eat. I kept working on stuff in the kitchen, and I was shaking so bad I almost dropped the turkey platter as I carried out the carved bird. I skipped dinner and laid down for a half an hour, until I was able to stand up again. I couldn't stand being around anyone, so I went for a drive to the ocean, and just sat in the surf for like 3 hours. I finally came home and went to bed just before midnight, and I didn't leave the house for almost a week. Most of my time was spent on the couch, wathcing television and eating constantly. I am starting to come out of it, and things are getting better now that New Year's is past.

I'm not sure what I am going to do now. I am still living on residual paychecks from the school, but I know that money will run out soon. I imagine I am going to have to start making some decisions to move on and start another job. Sue thinks she might be able to get me a job with her, as a substance abuse counselor, and I think that would be an awesome opportunity. There are also some more teaching opportunities, and some jobs with the county, state, and federal government that I need to look into. There are jobs out there; I just need to start the process of looking again.

Though I am feeling better, I really miss all of my friends in Michigan. Hopefully, I will be able to come home around spring break to see everyone.